Got rear ended—What do I look for?

Try to find a identical car and park in front or measure it to get a rough idea where it might have hit if really curious.
 
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I was rear-ended a couple of years back. I was basically stopped and hit from behind at 20+ mph. It was enough to impact that it pushed me into the car in front and the next one.
No one in my car was hurt (Me, my daughter, and her friend). The damage to the Murano was pretty hidden.
The car that hit us deployed airbags and was disabled.
After the police took statements we continued our trip to Magic Mountain :)

I handled the claim directly with our insurance (Progressive). They inspected the car and then I took it to a body shop. The shop pulled some panels and found the rear quarter panels were bent. They totaled the car and paid us a pretty good settlement. I got just below "Clean Retail" price on the NADA estimate. I think I even got the full deductible back from the at-fault party.

So not EVERY accident needs a team of lawyers, don't believe everything you hear on the radio/tv commercials.

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Insurance companies are predictably not playing nice, especially his Canadian insurance. Both my insurance and hi are offering to send out appraisers to take a look. However I'm worried the appraisers aren't going to do a thorough enough job inspecting the car for damage. I really want to take it to a shop and get it looked at but his insurance is telling me "Our policy is to cover only damage that has been appraised by a TD appraiser." This seems like BS to me. What can I do here?
 
If the shop finds “hidden” damage it should be covered. Most of the time they won’t know until they start working on the vehicle

That was true when my mom's ford Escape got rear ended a couple years ago. The other insurance guy said stuff like rear bumper, tail light, hatch. She took it the shop she wanted and they added Full Left Side Rear Quarter Panel.

I'm not sure it was needed but that insurance paid for it. It took an extra week or so and they paid the extra rental time too. I don't even think it was replaced because after she got it back I pried the inner fender and a couple pieces of the interior away and all the paint and seam sealer looked like it came from the factory so I pulled the same parts from the other side. It looked exactly the same.
 
I went through this in January with my KL I opened a claim with my insurance and let them work out the details with geico. Worked out for me as mine carrier ended up totaling it and I don’t think geico would have. Get a good body shop to look at it and check the frame measurements.