Let's talk about the crazy shit you've heard from your HOA

Chris

Administrator
Staff Member
Ride of the Month Winner
Joined
Sep 28, 2015
Messages
70,955
Location
Florence, AZ
I'm fortunate enough to live in an HOA neighborhood, and thank god for that. Every single person I know (including my parents) have experiences the wrath of their HOA at some point or another, and I've heard about it all.

My sister recently moved down here to Salem. She told me today that her HOA sent her a letter saying that her husband can't park his work van in the driveway because it is a commercial truck with his company logo and information all over it. They said that only family vehicles are allowed in the driveways or on the street.

So first off, who on earth has the time to complain about something like that (another snowflake I'm guessing)? Secondly, what are the supposed to do then? It's his work truck. He is required to take it home with him since he is a union plumber and he's always on call. There's no possible way he could leave it at work.

My sister is worried they will try to fine them and crap. I told her to find the HOA president himself and tell him to fuck off and find something worthwhile to complain about. It's a small cargo van with a logo on it. It's the size of a Ford Econoline!
 
  • Like
Reactions: dylansalrin
Out here on lake Minnetonka we have a bay that the dock is on that is no wake. If even the slightest break in the stagnant bay water forms the other bay neighbors call the HOA. lol it's so crazy to think these people watch others all day just to complain.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
  • Like
Reactions: Chris
I used to live in Murray Hills in Beaverton Oregon. At that time i was an evp for a software company. I spent on average 3 out of 4 weeks traveling around the world to deal with my operations. When home I built custom Harley's, frame up builds as well as did repairs and customizing for a good number of friends and their friends. The busy bodies of the neighborhood were convinced that Hells Angles had moved in. I lived there for 10 years! Eventually I get a HOA summons to meet with the HOA leadership. I had some explaining to do! I show up in a suit and show them my business card. I tell them what had been going on for years in my plush garage and the fact that at no time was my garage door ever open after 10 pm. They finally decided I was no serious threat to the tranquility of the neighborhood. That was the last time I have lived in a HOA neighborhood and will never again deal with small minded snobs again.
If you think it's special to live in a HOA neighborhood, you too are a small minded snob!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
  • Like
Reactions: Chris
Out here on lake Minnetonka we have a bay that the dock is on that is no wake. If even the slightest break in the stagnant bay water forms the other bay neighbors call the HOA. lol it's so crazy to think these people watch others all day just to complain.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Haha, sounds like your typical HOA! It's like they just look for things to complain about.

I used to live in Murray Hills in Beaverton Oregon. At that time i was an evp for a software company. I spent on average 3 out of 4 weeks traveling around the world to deal with my operations. When home I built custom Harley's, frame up builds as well as did repairs and customizing for a good number of friends and their friends. The busy bodies of the neighborhood were convinced that Hells Angles had moved in. I lived there for 10 years! Eventually I get a HOA summons to meet with the HOA leadership. I had some explaining to do! I show up in a suit and show them my business card. I tell them what had been going on for years in my plush garage and the fact that at no time was my garage door ever open after 10 pm. They finally decided I was no serious threat to the tranquility of the neighborhood. That was the last time I have lived in a HOA neighborhood and will never again deal with small minded snobs again.
If you think it's special to live in a HOA neighborhood, you too are a small minded snob!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Ahhh yes, I used to live in Murray Hill, so I know that neighborhood and those type of people (most of them at least). I agree entirely. I lived in a few HOA neighborhoods before this one, and when we moved I told myself I will never again live in one. Every single neighborhood I lived in with an HOA was a bad experience. Like you said, simple minded snobs. They probably can't even change their own oil, that's how hands-off they are.
 
Haha, sounds like your typical HOA! It's like they just look for things to complain about.



Ahhh yes, I used to live in Murray Hill, so I know that neighborhood and those type of people (most of them at least). I agree entirely. I lived in a few HOA neighborhoods before this one, and when we moved I told myself I will never again live in one. Every single neighborhood I lived in with an HOA was a bad experience. Like you said, simple minded snobs. They probably can't even change their own oil, that's how hands-off they are.

Ya I know, how bout I pay $200. a month HOA fees so someone can tell me what plants I can have in my front yard!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
  • Like
Reactions: Chris
When I was a kid I asked my dad what the HOA is for. He said "Something they try to make me pay into so they can give me a fine for leaving my trash cans out too long"

He has gone on 10 years now without paying them and they keep sending him "threatening letters" that he has to. When its my turn to get a house, I am avoiding a HOA at all cost.

They tried to tell me I can not do a tire rotation in the drive way.
Idiots.

Sent from my SM-G935T using Tapatalk
 
  • Like
Reactions: Chris
Ya I know, how bout I pay $200. a month HOA fees so someone can tell me what plants I can have in my front yard!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

At our old place it was $250 a month, and we were in litigation with the HOA because they had been mismanaging the funds and weren't using them for any of the repairs that needed done. On top of that they wanted to request some back up funding (or some technical bullshit) from the home owners so they could get emergency funds to fix things (when it should have been coming from the money the mismanaged). I don't know all the details, but the homeowners were in litigation with the contractor who built the places, because he owned the HOA or some mumbo jumbo like that. It was hell!
 
He has gone on 10 years now without paying them and they keep sending him "threatening letters" that he has to.

My sister said she was worried they would fine her. I told her not to pay the fines. She said that they can make you. I said how can they make you? She said I don't know. I said don't pay them, the most they can do is take you to small claims court, but I don't think they'd want to go through that anyways.

I applaud your Dad for not paying them. HOAs are something that is put in place by yuppies to make other yuppies abide by their B.S. laws. Problem is, every once in a while you get someone like me, your dad, or the rest of us in there, who won't take them seriously, and won't put up (or pay) with their B.S.
 
My sister said she was worried they would fine her. I told her not to pay the fines. She said that they can make you. I said how can they make you? She said I don't know. I said don't pay them, the most they can do is take you to small claims court, but I don't think they'd want to go through that anyways.

I applaud your Dad for not paying them. HOAs are something that is put in place by yuppies to make other yuppies abide by their B.S. laws. Problem is, every once in a while you get someone like me, your dad, or the rest of us in there, who won't take them seriously, and won't put up (or pay) with their B.S.
Its ridiculous they force this onto home owners. He got a letter today saying "If you do not pay this amount by this date, you will be contacted by our attorney" blah blah blah, they wont leave him alone, but the people living down the street haven't cut their grass in months, have a car leaking oil all down the driveway into the street, nah lets just bother this guy instead who maintains his home.

I doubt it will go through, this isn't even the original HOA when he bought his house, so he never signed papers agreeing to their terms anyways. The HOA is based out of Las Vegas, we live in Leander, Tx. They need to go fly a kite.

Sent from my SM-G935T using Tapatalk
 
Out here on lake Minnetonka we have a bay that the dock is on that is no wake. If even the slightest break in the stagnant bay water forms the other bay neighbors call the HOA. lol it's so crazy to think these people watch others all day just to complain.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Its Minnetonka, I would expect nothing less.
 
Its ridiculous they force this onto home owners. He got a letter today saying "If you do not pay this amount by this date, you will be contacted by our attorney" blah blah blah, they wont leave him alone, but the people living down the street haven't cut their grass in months, have a car leaking oil all down the driveway into the street, nah lets just bother this guy instead who maintains his home.

I doubt it will go through, this isn't even the original HOA when he bought his house, so he never signed papers agreeing to their terms anyways. The HOA is based out of Las Vegas, we live in Leander, Tx. They need to go fly a kite.

Sent from my SM-G935T using Tapatalk

Yep, that's how our old HOA was as well. Wasn't even based in the same state. Like okay, at that point you can just go fuck yourself.

As I understand it, HOAs are a way for contractors who build houses to make some extra money.
 
HOA's are fine. Just dont buy into one unless you are down with the by-laws. And dont let one form if your neighbors try to pull one off. Its one of my deals when buying a house. Ask realtor is there an HOA here? Yes...Ok next house....
 
  • Like
Reactions: Blank
I agree with many of you guys about the restrictions and flat out intrusiveness of HOAs.

HOWEVER.

We moved last fall and probably lost 15-25k on our house.
We bought that house 10 years ago in what was a nice family neighborhood. It was probably one of only 3 mid-price-range neighborhoods in what's considered a pricey suburb.
We had a HOA , but 8 years ago we were annexed by the city and our HOA covenant lost it's legal teeth.
The result was that a few new people moved in and let their property go to shit. I could give you numerous examples but most of it was people not cutting grass, junk cars permanently parked on the street, boats front yards, giant RVs parked in driveways and blocking sidewalks etc etc. The cumulative effect was a subdivision full of eyesores. Our realtor told us that at least 3 buyers coming over never made it to our house. They'd turn around before they got there.
It was bad enough that we were once asked if the house next door to us was in foreclosure because of the grass and weeds that had grown up around it. It wasn't. The young hipster couple living there were just lazy scumbags hiding behind "allergies".
When we put our house up for sale, we had to pay a neighborhood kid to keep their yard looking decent so it wouldn't scare off buyers.
I also had to ask the neighbor on the other side of us to clean up all the s*** his 5 dogs left in his yard so buyers wouldn't gag on our front porch.

We'd have people come look at our house and the feedback we got was usually something along the lines of "we love the house but the neighborhood isn't for us".

We had to lower the price.

In the end, we broke even but should have done much better. I'm still pretty pissed about it.
We're still in contact with our old neighbors. There are a lot of little crimes happening over there. Car and shed break ins and even a domestic situation that resulted in a shooting.
Sounds like we got out just in time.

HOAs can suck, but they can also serve a purpose. These days many of your neighbors suck and won't give two shits about you.

Or maybe I'm just a snob.
 
Last edited:
Problem with HOAs is that the usually end up being run by snobby yuppies. If you had someone level headed in there like some of us, I am sure we could be much more reasonable and fair. All my experiences with HOAs involve people complaining over the silliest little things. Hell, one time I was changing my oil in the driveway and they complained and wrote me a letter.

Like stop writing me letters to complain! If you have an issue, come say it to my face!!
 
I've heard the stories. And I got complained on a couple of times too. They are aggravating, especially if they are run by some little old rule nazi with nothing better to do than ride around on a golf cart measuring people's grass.

But I gotta tellya, If an HOA could have helped me get that extra 20k out of that house, I'd have been the first in line to join up.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Chris
My wife's house, now my house too, is in an HOA. Although I'm not crazy about them, I have a story.
The neighbors right next door started a church in their house. For months it went on. We ignored it for the most part. However, as time went on, they started getting more people and louder. Daily choir practice. Think cats in a dryer. They open their windows, "sing" loud and play their piano and then close them when done. They then started using live bands, microphones and amps. We confronted them when they started using our trash cans because theirs couldn't contain the trash from their business. We heard her clearly tell the woman that opened the door to tell us she wasn't there. When we finally talked to her she said it was within HOA rules that she could have get togethers. The HOA finally called them in. The church stopped. Although we still have parties at their house every single weekend and we can't have our windows open when it's nice due to these incredibly inconsiderate neighbors. They throw stuff over the wall into our backyard. The kids threw all of their recycling over the fence into the pool, plastic bottles, as the mother looked on. I so wish they would move away. I can't even look at them because I hate how bad they are. I want to take the pipes off my motorcycles and just let them idle in the driveway during their parties. The parties are the church members, not like an occasional family party.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 
  • Like
Reactions: Umbra and Chris
My wife's house, now my house too, is in an HOA. Although I'm not crazy about them, I have a story.
The neighbors right next door started a church in their house. For months it went on. We ignored it for the most part. However, as time went on, they started getting more people and louder. Daily choir practice. Think cats in a dryer. They open their windows, "sing" loud and play their piano and then close them when done. They then started using live bands, microphones and amps. We confronted them when they started using our trash cans because theirs couldn't contain the trash from their business. We heard her clearly tell the woman that opened the door to tell us she wasn't there. When we finally talked to her she said it was within HOA rules that she could have get togethers. The HOA finally called them in. The church stopped. Although we still have parties at their house every single weekend and we can't have our windows open when it's nice due to these incredibly inconsiderate neighbors. They throw stuff over the wall into our backyard. The kids threw all of their recycling over the fence into the pool, plastic bottles, as the mother looked on. I so wish they would move away. I can't even look at them because I hate how bad they are. I want to take the pipes off my motorcycles and just let them idle in the driveway during their parties. The parties are the church members, not like an occasional family party.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I have a similar situation with a similar type neighbor.
When we moved into this house 12 years ago, the neighbor that lived next to us was awesome. The house was well maintained and the yard made everyone else's look like shit, she had it professionally mowed and maintained, and has a nice in-ground pool. 2 years after we moved in, she had to sell her house because it was just too much for her, she was just widowed with a 15 year old daughter.
The couple who bought it has 4 kids, ages 6-12, at the time. They "seemed" ok at first.
Six months after moving in, the husband leaves her and the kids, apparently he had another woman for quite awhile. I felt bad for her, for a minute, at least.
This is where it begins. She began having "loud" parties until all hours of the night. Very loud talking/yelling and loud music until at least 1-2 am most weekends. She would let her kids, and her friends kids, run the neighborhood screaming and yelling the whole time. My wife and I deemed them her "pity" parties, because her husband left her. Even during the day, if they are home and outside, they are "very" loud, even to this day. We have called the cops on her several times after 11 pm, because I work most weekends.
She has pretty much stopped taking care of the house, except the pool of course. The yard is practically just dirt now, and the wood siding on the house is rotting away. I keep telling my wife that she's going to run that house into the ground and lower the value and when she finally moves (which wouldn't be too soon for me) it could allow the wrong kind of people in.
I do not like HOA's either, but I can see where they might help in a situation like this. I just couldn't stand all the other shit that comes with them.
BTW, I keep racking my brain about how I can get even with this neighbor, without disturbing my other neighbors.
I get up for work everyday at 5 am and I know she's still asleep. I figure if she can keep me up at night, I can wake her early in the morning. Of course, unlike her, I respect my other neighbors.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Umbra and Chris
I'll never ever ever live in a HOA. I currently live in a small town, with a few neighbors. But my wife and I are currently saving up to buy a house in the country.

I dream of at least 3 acres, surrounded by trees and 0 annoying retard moron neighbors.
 
  • Like
Reactions: UpperMI and Chris
I have a similar situation with a similar type neighbor.
When we moved into this house 12 years ago, the neighbor that lived next to us was awesome. The house was well maintained and the yard made everyone else's look like shit, she had it professionally mowed and maintained, and has a nice in-ground pool. 2 years after we moved in, she had to sell her house because it was just too much for her, she was just widowed with a 15 year old daughter.
The couple who bought it has 4 kids, ages 6-12, at the time. They "seemed" ok at first.
Six months after moving in, the husband leaves her and the kids, apparently he had another woman for quite awhile. I felt bad for her, for a minute, at least.
This is where it begins. She began having "loud" parties until all hours of the night. Very loud talking/yelling and loud music until at least 1-2 am most weekends. She would let her kids, and her friends kids, run the neighborhood screaming and yelling the whole time. My wife and I deemed them her "pity" parties, because her husband left her. Even during the day, if they are home and outside, they are "very" loud, even to this day. We have called the cops on her several times after 11 pm, because I work most weekends.
She has pretty much stopped taking care of the house, except the pool of course. The yard is practically just dirt now, and the wood siding on the house is rotting away. I keep telling my wife that she's going to run that house into the ground and lower the value and when she finally moves (which wouldn't be too soon for me) it could allow the wrong kind of people in.
I do not like HOA's either, but I can see where they might help in a situation like this. I just couldn't stand all the other shit that comes with them.
BTW, I keep racking my brain about how I can get even with this neighbor, without disturbing my other neighbors.
I get up for work everyday at 5 am and I know she's still asleep. I figure if she can keep me up at night, I can wake her early in the morning. Of course, unlike her, I respect my other neighbors.


That's interesting. One of the "bad" neighbors in the 'hood we left was very similar.

She bought the biggest/most expensive house in the subdivision. When she moved in, some neighbors pitched in and maintained her yard for her because she "couldn't afford a mower". After a couple of months, the HOA paid a lawn service to do it for a few weeks until the weather turned cold. This year, she still "can't afford a mower" and her kids (around 12 and 14 yo) run the streets all night causing mischief.
Knocking over garbage cans, letting peoples dogs out of back yards, running through backyards at 0300, walking into people's houses and demanding snacks etc.
She also has a lot of overnight visitors who park illegally on the very narrow street, blocking driveways so people can't get out.
And she "can't afford"garbage pick up, so she was just throwing trash bags in the back yard until the health dept. showed up because of the varmints coming to the smorgasbord.
And of course the HOA was powerless to do anything about any of it other than notify the city, which did nothing about any of it.

What was one of the nicest houses in the neighborhood now looks like a tenement and her immediate neighbors are moving.