I’ve always been a gun guy. My ex even bought me guns.
One day she told me I had to get rid of all but 2 hunting guns. Not long after that she became my ex.
Significant Other Advice
- Thread starter Hobbes62
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One day she told me I had to get rid of all but 2 hunting guns. Not long after that she became my ex.
Starrs
TJ Guru
This is a true story and happened a long time ago when I was in high school. So my GF at the time we dated off and on for a year or so. One day she up and just decides it’s not working and I don’t spend enough time with her. I spend all my time with my friends and go to the gym way too much yada yada yada lol. So then the next guy she gets with ended up being somebody I knew from the gym haha. I told him nice knowing ya man...she’s gonna leave you if you stay in here too long. He replied no way she loves when I work out. Women..they are a confusing species to say the least. We do need them a few times tho haha.
Let us know how it turns out. That way we can help you spend some of the money.
Women are usually into spending an inordinate amount of money (in our eyes), on a pair of shoes for every moment, it's constantly shoes, shoes, shoes or hair, nails, massages, they don't see that the same as us and our guns, jeeps, tools, or whatever. It's a double standard . Can drive one nuts. If they ever see it you are good to go. Or just split some money between yourselves, buy what you want, and move on.
Your absolutely right, I stayed in a marriage 10 longer than I should have. Second biggest mistake I've ever made, the first was marrying her.
xxdabroxx
TJ Addict
My wife and I are somewhat following the Dave Ramsey way. We are debt free, saving for retirement, etc. We make a monthly budget and each get an equal allowance do do with as we please. The only thing that bothers me is she is better at saving her allowance than me.
I told my wife it was for her... I’ve told her different wheels, or new top, would make her look cool, I’ve told her a lift would make it ride better... all this have worked for me..Over 15 years, 3 TJ’s and one jk later and it’s still working.. I love working on HER jeep
My gf always wondered why I spent so much adding to the Jeep.I told my wife it was for her... I’ve told her different wheels, or new top, would make her look cool, I’ve told her a lift would make it ride better... all this have worked for me..Over 15 years, 3 TJ’s and one jk later and it’s still working.. I love working on HER jeep
Took her on a difficult trail that was 5 miles in and then 5 miles back out. We never saw another vehicle the entire time and the entire trail is black/difficult. Right about the turnaround we got somewhere the lockers couldn’t get us out. Self recovered with the winch.
She said she fully understands and supports it now. I’m convinced girlfriends are better than wives.
It’s was so much easier when we could just drop them off at the insane asylum. World has went to hell in a hand basket.
Good luck brother
Good luck brother
Long ago my wife said … "happy wife, happy life". I said … "no, happy spouse, happy house". Fair's fair, we haven't discussed it since.
My partner came from a marriage where the very well paid husband was heavily involved in sport. With the group mentality came a lot of drinking culture, which led to gambling. Flow on was her trying to keep a household together on very little cash after he'd lost everything yet again all the while promising he'd never do it again.
So, my car fetish is a breath of fresh air and seen to be something positive. It's also seen to be something that I have to keep up as it makes me happy.
Tell you what though, I see a lot of my friends now falling into the travelling and wine collecting mindset. Where going away and spending $1500 on cases of wine over a weekend is a fairly normal thing to do. Sit down with them at a social outing and unless you're chatting about where they are travelling to next, or where they've just been, or worse how great is this bottle of red is they have nothing.
To the OP, I'd spend a bit of time doing sporadic gestures for a bit and see how it goes. Pick her up on Friday and go out for a quick meal and a movie, send her a text to tell her how much she means to you, cook her a nice meal. Stuff that doesn't cost much but shows you care. Get her to talk about what she wants out of life and explain to her what makes you happy. She may have concerns that you aren't privy to, talking about things might get them to surface.
Else just trade her in and get a newer, upgraded version.
So, my car fetish is a breath of fresh air and seen to be something positive. It's also seen to be something that I have to keep up as it makes me happy.
Tell you what though, I see a lot of my friends now falling into the travelling and wine collecting mindset. Where going away and spending $1500 on cases of wine over a weekend is a fairly normal thing to do. Sit down with them at a social outing and unless you're chatting about where they are travelling to next, or where they've just been, or worse how great is this bottle of red is they have nothing.
To the OP, I'd spend a bit of time doing sporadic gestures for a bit and see how it goes. Pick her up on Friday and go out for a quick meal and a movie, send her a text to tell her how much she means to you, cook her a nice meal. Stuff that doesn't cost much but shows you care. Get her to talk about what she wants out of life and explain to her what makes you happy. She may have concerns that you aren't privy to, talking about things might get them to surface.
Else just trade her in and get a newer, upgraded version.
So I was in love with this salvage titled SE TJ then 5 months later I fell in love with a Miata... wait.. that’s not me. I find that I feel better about spending money on me things if I spoil her a little first. I will have to add that we knuckled down and bought a house before either of us would go too crazy with personal spending. My wife has horses now so she doesn’t even ask how much I spend on toys.
Start by talking to your wife about it. Discuss how it makes each of you feel about spending money right now. It sounds like you're both wanting different things for the income right now. She may see the money going to college and a house to build a future with her husband and future kids. You may see jeep parts for a current build project. Marriages take communication and compromise to get on the same page.
xxdabroxx
TJ Addict
She saved her spending money and bought a diamond ring last year when her favorite jewelry store went out of business. This year I'm trying to do better and save up for some PRP seats for the Jeep.
I recently retired. While working, the bulk of my paycheck went into our joint checking but anything over a certain amount went into a credit union account that I used for whatever I wanted. My wife pretty much handles the household finances but my credit union account was mine to use as I wished. Sometimes it was used for Jeep stuff, sometimes to buy her something nice. It was great.
So now in retirement, we're doing basically the same thing. I get a monthly allowance of a couple hundred bucks that goes into my credit union account and the rest goes into our joint checking just like before. That keeps me on a budget and my hobbies have no impact on household finances.
Works for us.
If your wife is totally against you doing the things that make you happy, you have some decisions to make. At some point, you may have to choose between staying married and living the life you desire. I'm very fortunate to be married to someone who recognizes how important my hobbies are to my enjoyment of life, especially now that I'm no longer working. What would I do with my time if I couldn't afford hobbies?
So now in retirement, we're doing basically the same thing. I get a monthly allowance of a couple hundred bucks that goes into my credit union account and the rest goes into our joint checking just like before. That keeps me on a budget and my hobbies have no impact on household finances.
Works for us.
If your wife is totally against you doing the things that make you happy, you have some decisions to make. At some point, you may have to choose between staying married and living the life you desire. I'm very fortunate to be married to someone who recognizes how important my hobbies are to my enjoyment of life, especially now that I'm no longer working. What would I do with my time if I couldn't afford hobbies?
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I'm searching for a second TJ for my kids to drive. I have money set aside for the purchase, but the wife isn't real supportive of the plan. I'm going to buy one anyway; she will get over it.
Marriage is a balance and your new wife is setting the standard for yours. You are going to live with the balance for the rest of your married life, set a good/fair balance now.
Marriage is a balance and your new wife is setting the standard for yours. You are going to live with the balance for the rest of your married life, set a good/fair balance now.
Married since 2003. First 5 years were A LOT of learning and molding to each other, hard work, getting rid of things we didn't like about each other (both had to do this), and no kids...definitely no kids through this process. After 5 years we realized we were forever mates. Those first 5 years set the tone for the kind of marriage we wanted. A happy one.
I cannot tell you what to do in your marriage or how to deal with your situation. What I can tell you is what has worked for me... Love, respect, A LOT of patience, and just as important...A LOT of communication. You both have to be willing to invest in your relationship. It won't work if only one of you is willing to work hard. As it has been stated in earlier posts, team work and compromises will be crucial to having a successful and happy marriage.
I cannot tell you what to do in your marriage or how to deal with your situation. What I can tell you is what has worked for me... Love, respect, A LOT of patience, and just as important...A LOT of communication. You both have to be willing to invest in your relationship. It won't work if only one of you is willing to work hard. As it has been stated in earlier posts, team work and compromises will be crucial to having a successful and happy marriage.