That's pretty much it but I want to pay them and I want them to get paid. I don't want something for free, I don't want to defraud anyone. What started us down this path is their customer service rep. I politely listed the small issues I wanted taken care of. One of them was a set of back wall to side panel clips. The instructions say "please do not omit this step". He said they were not needed and I had the wrong set of instructions. To show me the error, he included a digital version of them with a screen shot of the page I was supposed to follow. It said, "please do not omit this step" with pictures showing exactly what my instructions said since they were in fact, the exact same instructions.
I knew at that point it wasn't going to go well but I kept at it patiently explaining what was wrong. They ignored me, I explained at that point I was not one of those who you can ignore and I will file a charge back to get your attention. So, either send me a set of instructions showing that the clips are not needed or send me two clips with screws.
Mind you, these are small straps about 3" long, 1/2" wide with a hole in each end for a #10 screw. They are worth about a buck fifty on an expensive day. They would rather not get paid over something like that. Or, they can fix the instructions and send those over. Either works and if I had 5 grand riding on that, I know what I would do even if I had to go whittle them out of a chunk of stainless with my pocket knife.
Final update on this mess. We won the dispute. The seller known as BV from here on called as soon as they got notice they lost. Asked when they could come and pick up the sauna. I explained that we really kinda wanted to keep it and the dispute was simply to get their attention. He said he would get everything handled so BV could get paid.
Then he committed a fatal error. He sent an email as soon as we got off the phone asking for THE list of the items to be forwarded to them yet again. A list that was dissected in the dispute process. A list that was bandied back and forth several times via email to all parties concerned. Sorry, nope, not gonna do your job for you and as I discussed my irritation over this with Kat, we both realized at the same time that their lifetime warranty was going to be pretty much bullshit.
Once we came to that realization, we were done. I fired off an email to that effect to all parties concerned, explained that we had zero confidence in them, the company, the product, their warranty, or the personnel associated with both.
The original Customer Service feller JS replied back that he was very sorry blah blah blah what does it take to keep you in the Clearlight family? I finally got to get a few licks in with my reply. (highly paraphrased) You sir are the sole reason for this problem, you fucked it, you cannot unfuck it. Come and get your sauna off of my porch.
crickets
more crickets
I rattle their cage with a "ya'll need to get this handled or I will assume from your lack of response that the sauna is mine to dispose of as I see fit".
JS replies "BV will be accepting the return. We require that you disassemble the unit, package it, palletize it and let me know when that is done so I can send the freight company by to collect it."
I reply- With the kindest regards possible in these circumstances, hell will freeze over first before I do all of that. Send a crew by to handle it, let me know when they are going to be here. If that is longer than a week, I'm putting it on Craig's List for free to anyone who can come by and haul it off.
Yippee! I get an email from a local company saying they will be here in the AM to retrieve their property.
The saddest part of all of this is that it could all have been easily circumvented by mailing me 20 dollars' worth of shit, telling me to install it per the instructions and telling me to throw away the heater or send a call tag for it. Just dumb, beyond dumb.