Joke thread

Fitzpatrick

TJ Enthusiast
Joined
May 25, 2018
Messages
425
Location
Nevada
There was a man that wanted to become a farmer, but had no idea where to begin. So he moved to a small rural farming area and purchased a barren farm. After acquiring the farm he went to town to a feed store. He spoke to the owner and told he him just purchased a farm but had no idea where to start. So the store owner told him a good start would be to buy a hen for it’s eggs and told the man that in theses parts they call a hen a pullet. Then the owner said the next thing would be to purchase a rooster as an alarm to wake him every morning and told him that in these parts they call roosters cocks. Finally the owner told him the last thing he would need was a mule to help plow his fields and went on to tell him they are called an ass in these parts and the only one he had was an mean old one that stops and when he does you have to get off of him and scratch his belly to get him to move again. Happy with his purchases he took off on the mule with a rooster under one arm and the hen under another. A few miles down the road the mule stopped. Now the man starts remembering he has to scratch his belly to make him go again but realizes if he were to do that he’d have to set down the hen and rooster and he knows they’ll just run away. So he sit for a long time before a stranger comes and asks if he need help. The man replies why yes could you please hold my cock and pullet while I scratch my ass.
 
So a guy walks into a bookstore and asks the clerk " do you have Trumps book on deportation" The clerk looked at the man and said "Get the f%^* out of here" The man replied ,yeah thats the one I want!
 
Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, “Where did you get such a great bike?” The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second engineer nodded approvingly, and said: “Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”
 
Joke

AF3A4491-B0E2-45EF-9C8C-0E7A57B3ABCF.jpeg
 
  • Like
Reactions: Fitzpatrick