I had a friend, Lloyd, who was 20 years older than me and was a really good natured man. I loved the guy.
I also loved jackin' with him and he put up with me for 20 years.
As some of you may or may not know by now, I'm a smart ass.
So when I first met Lloyd, he had problems with his eyes and he would constantly blink.
I called him Blinky.
He had some beautiful distinguished white hair, so when he got his eyes fixed...
I called him Snowflake.
He started smoking "Misty" cigarettes...
Yes, he was then Misty.
Went up to NC to live for 3 years or so and when I came back, his wife had passed away and he'd remarried.
He'd also bought a TJ. A real nice one. Of course I gave him shit, saying it was the #1 selling vehicle bought by homosexuals and would ask if he went cruising for guys on the weekends.
On the back of his Jeep was the name "Mariah" custom painted in cursive writing. I guess that's the name of his new wife, I thought.
Well, being single, I got invited over to their house quite often for parties and such and met his wife. I called her "Lomax" from the little town she was from and I was called "T-Bone" because of my last name.
Her name wasn't Miriah.
At work the next weekend I asked Lloyd, "Why in the hell do you have "Mariah" on the back of your Jeep?"
Lloyd replied with "Well, Roger, that's the trim level, like Sahara."
"Lloyd, you're an idiot. There is no such thing as a Mariah Jeep Package. You've been driving around for 2 years with some chicks name scrolled on the back of your ride, you clueless F*ck!"
And then it was on:
"Lloyd, just what does the Mariah package come with? Tampon dispenser, a special compartment to put your Misty cigarettes, does it take 2 hours to "warm" her up before you can get going?"
Yes, I then called Lloyd...Mariah.
I also loved jackin' with him and he put up with me for 20 years.
As some of you may or may not know by now, I'm a smart ass.
So when I first met Lloyd, he had problems with his eyes and he would constantly blink.
I called him Blinky.
He had some beautiful distinguished white hair, so when he got his eyes fixed...
I called him Snowflake.
He started smoking "Misty" cigarettes...
Yes, he was then Misty.
Went up to NC to live for 3 years or so and when I came back, his wife had passed away and he'd remarried.
He'd also bought a TJ. A real nice one. Of course I gave him shit, saying it was the #1 selling vehicle bought by homosexuals and would ask if he went cruising for guys on the weekends.
On the back of his Jeep was the name "Mariah" custom painted in cursive writing. I guess that's the name of his new wife, I thought.
Well, being single, I got invited over to their house quite often for parties and such and met his wife. I called her "Lomax" from the little town she was from and I was called "T-Bone" because of my last name.
Her name wasn't Miriah.
At work the next weekend I asked Lloyd, "Why in the hell do you have "Mariah" on the back of your Jeep?"
Lloyd replied with "Well, Roger, that's the trim level, like Sahara."
"Lloyd, you're an idiot. There is no such thing as a Mariah Jeep Package. You've been driving around for 2 years with some chicks name scrolled on the back of your ride, you clueless F*ck!"
And then it was on:
"Lloyd, just what does the Mariah package come with? Tampon dispenser, a special compartment to put your Misty cigarettes, does it take 2 hours to "warm" her up before you can get going?"
Yes, I then called Lloyd...Mariah.
